Message Through a Wire
by Sweetafelita
Summary: A You've Got Mail parody: Only this time, it's Stephanie and Chris Jericho communicating....
1. Seeking

Message Through a Wire

Message Through a Wire

Chapter One: Seeking 

You never really do know who's on the other end of that instant message…

{Disclaimer: Vince McMahon owns the WWF. Characters belong to Titan Sports.}

~*~*~

"Milk on my clothes, milk on my shoes… Milk in my hair…" Stephanie McMahon Helmsley stripped herself of any milk stained items. "I cannot believe this is happening!" Stephanie screwed up her nose at the smell of her new designer skirt. "Steph, calm down." Shane tried to reason with his sister. 

Stephanie threw her hands up in the air and screamed. "Calm down? CALM DOWN? That's a real good one, Shane. One for you. How can I calm down when I have cow's urine all over me?" Shane frowned. "Milk isn't cow's urine." 

"Well, it came out of a cow, and it came from its penis. It's urine." Stephanie groaned and swiped the paper towel out of Shane's hand. "Steph, milk doesn't come from a cow's penis. It's the utters." Shane informed his irate sister. 

"Who asked you anyway?"

Shane sighed. "Okay, okay. Change or something. And put those clothes into the washer machine. They smell horrible." Stephanie glared at her brother. "Thanks for being such great help, Shane. It's much appreciated." 

"Look, sis, just because your ex affair came out-" Shane started, fiddling with his wedding ring. Stephanie frowned. "It wasn't an affair." She protested. Shane's face did not change expression. "He kissed you on more than one occasion."

Stephanie held the door open for her brother. "Go. Now." Shane didn't need any more proof. He left without another word. Stephanie straightened out her skirt. "God, this smells like shit." She held it loosely around her wrist and slammed it into the washing machine. 

"God, I need a break." She decided. Flipping on her laptop computer, she typed in her password lazily and waited for internet to connect. 

"Welcome," She muttered along with her computer, "you've got mail…" Clicking on her mouse, she wrinkled her nose up. "Delete, delete, delete…God, why would I want this? Idiots." Stephanie clicked off of her mailbox and decided to pay a visit in the WWF chat. 

Scratching her head, she clicked into one from the people connection, and opened it. She typed: "Hey everyone. What do you think of Stephanie McMahon?" The replies were the same: "Slut. Whore. Ho. Jericho rocks!" 

"Whatever," She typed. Before she could click out, an instant message popped up. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: hi a/s/l? 

Stephanie raised her eyebrow and shrugged. "Hell, I might as well talk to him. Even if he is a Jericho fan." She typed in her usual Comic Sans MS font:

DominantGirl00: hey 24/f/Connecticut, u? 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: 29/m/Canada

DominantGirl00: Oh, just like Chris Jericho? 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Yeah, exactly like Chris Jericho. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Well, I take it you're a Steph fan.

DominantGirl00: Damn right I am. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: So what's your name?

DominantGirl00: Privacy is needed. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: I got ya. 

*

Chris Irvine sat at his computer, frowning. "Why won't she give me her name?" He asked himself. Sure, her screen name alone told him she was a complete bitch, but she seemed interesting. 

He exited the instant message, knowing that she, if she really was a she, would IM him again. And sure enough…

DominantGirl00: So…what kind of interests do you have? 

He frowned and sighed. "Hmm…What should I tell her?" Unsure, he typed: 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Mystery women I talk to on the internet

DominantGirl00: Really? Interesting. I am actually seeking a boyfriend.

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Well, we have something in common. I am seeking a girlfriend.

DominantGirl00: Lovely. So now what? We're gonna meet somewhere and you're gonna rape me? I don't think so. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Wouldn't dream of it. I am really gentle, honest.

DominantGirl00: I'll see about that. Well, I g2g… Can I put you on my buddy list? 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Only if I can put you on mine.

DominantGirl00: Yeah, sure. Bye.

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Bye. 


	2. Transformation

Message Through a Wire

Message Through a Wire

A fic by the Angel 

Chapter Two: Transformation

You never really do know who's on the other end of that instant message…

{Disclaimer: Vince McMahon owns the WWF. Characters belong to Titan Sports.}

~*~*~

Chris Jericho clicked on his computer as soon as he got to the arena. He loved his trusty ol laptop. He hoped he had received any kind of mail from that DominantGirl00. 

When his mailbox was empty, he frowned. "Damn it. Why didn't she…" 

"Hello, Chris." Stephanie sneaked up behind him and made him jump. Chris sighed. He pulled back his hair to keep from strangling her. "Go to hell, Stephanie." She placed her hands on her hips and smiled. "Why, certainly, Chris. Just show me the way." 

His eye twitched, and he shut his laptop computer in a huff. "I am busy, Steph. Can we save our little chats for later? You know how much I love them." Stephanie smirked. "Yes, they are very interesting, aren't they?"

"Remember when I socked you in the face with a pie, Steph? Boy, was that exciting." Chris smiled at her and waited for her reply. She'd either stand there and cry or she'd stand there and cry. 

Stephanie glared towards the computer, not letting her face meet Chris's. "Who in the hell are you talking to on your computer, anyway? Probably some slut from a porno site." Chris grinned. "No, Steph, I didn't see your face on the intro." 

"Ha, ha. Remind me to laugh when it strikes me as funny. So, who were you talking to?" Stephanie fiddled with the computer, trying to open the internet. "You don't know my password," Chris said smugly. 

Stephanie snorted. "Knowing you-" 

"Ain't life a bitch, Steph?" He asked her. She glared at him. "Yes, it is. But, anyway, knowing you, your password is probably ayatollah or something along those lines." Chris grabbed the computer from her. "That's for me to know, and for you to find out." 

Stephanie groaned in frustration and threw her hands up. "Forget it. Honestly. You are the most annoying person I have ever met in my entire life!" She glared at him again, and left the room. 

"Thank you!" Chris shouted down the hall. 

*

Stephanie sighed as she burst into the Alliance dressing room. "Move, move, move." She shooed away any wrestlers that were in the way of her computer. "Stephanie, you're all red. You're going to pop a blood vessel." Stone Cold told her. 

  
She glared at him. "Go." She pointed to the door. The Rattlesnake frowned and went through it. As soon as her welcome screen popped up, she felt relieved and transformed. There was no way on Earth that Chris Jericho could bother her. 

An instant message popped up. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Hello there 

Stephanie grinned. She'd been waiting to talk to him. 

DominantGirl00: Hey. Did you just get online? 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: No, I was online for about five minutes

DominantGirl00: Oh, ok 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: So…Describe yourself.

Stephanie bit her lip. Should I lie? She thought. She sighed and typed whatever came to mind. 

DominantGirl00: Well, I have long brown hair, brown eyes, I am tall and thin

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: That sounds ok 

Stephanie made a face. "Okay?" She asked herself. 

DominantGirl00: What do YOU look like? 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Well, I am muscular and blonde 

DominantGirl00: That's all? 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Is there anything else you want to know? 

DominantGirl00: No, it's okay. I'll just let my imagination run wild. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: You do that. 

DominantGirl00: Funny. You remind of someone I know very well, but I can't place my finger on it. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: I do, do I? 

DominantGirl00: Yes, you do. You're screaming someone's name, but I can't tell who's…Ah, maybe it's just me. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Oh! I g2g. TTYL!

DominantGirl00: Later. 

*

Chris heard his cue to go onstage. He clicked off the computer, and smiled. She seemed sassy, this DominantGirl00, she seemed feisty. She seemed… Like Stephanie. "Nah," He said to himself. "It couldn't possibly be like that." 

  
Stephanie passed by his dressing room. "Steph!" He yelled. Stephanie came to a halt and turned around. "What?" She asked, annoyed. Chris grinned at her. "Where were you for the last five minutes?" Stephanie raised an eyebrow. "I was in my dressing room." 

"Oh, okay." Chris said. "No, it's not her at all." He paused. "Thank god." He threw his laptop into his bag and headed onstage. Time to bash Stephanie. 

He walked out onto the ramp, and smirked at Stephanie, who was standing in the middle of the ring. "What do you want, Chris Jericho?" Stephanie asked. "I have business to tend to." Chris chuckled. "And what kind of business would that be? Sprawled under Rhyno, screaming?" 

"No respect! None at all!" Paul Heyman exclaimed. Stephanie's bottom lip trembled. 

"You take that back, Chris Jericho!" Stephanie screamed. Chris smirked. "And then after Rhyno, you'll be under Test, and then after Test, you'll be under the Ticket Taker at the arena, and then after the Ticket Taker, you'll be under some hobo who asked you for a sandwich!" 

The crowd roared in laughter and started to chant 'slut, slut, slut'. Stephanie's eyes began to get misty. "Stop it! Stop it, all of you!" Chris grinned. Before he had a chance to reply, Rhyno came out from behind and punched him down to the steel ramp. Stephanie jumped and clapped her hands. 

Chris moaned in agony. When they shot to commercial break, Chris got up like nothing even happened. And at the same time that Stephanie and Chris left the ring, they both murmured, to themselves, "time to go online." 


	3. Lies Don't Work

Message Through a Wire

Message Through a Wire

A fic by The Angel

Chapter Three: Lies Don't Work 

You never really do know who's on the end of that instant message…

~*~*~

"Relief." Stephanie sighed in happiness. She had mail on computer, and grinning, she opened her mail eagerly. 

8/22/01 BREAKDOWNDAWALL1 Hello 

  
Stephanie opened her mail, and read what this mystery person had to say to her. 

Hi there. How come you never send me mail? I want to talk to you. I really want to know you. E-mail me back. 

Stephanie smirked at the mail and saw that he was on her buddy list. She decided to beat him to the punch, so she instant messaged him first. 

DominantGirl00: Hey. I read your mail. What do you want to know?

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Well…Everything. 

DominantGirl00: Everything? Aren't we getting risky here?

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Yeah, we are. Okay. What's your favorite color? 

DominantGirl00: LOL! So tactful! Pink. =) 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Typical. Mine is blue. 

DominantGirl00: And that's not typical?

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: :/ Yeah, it is. 

DominantGirl00: What do you do for a living? 

Chris gulped. Should he tell her? Would she think he was lying? 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: I kick people's ass. 

Stephanie raised an eyebrow. "Interesting," She said to herself. 

DominantGirl00: Lovely. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: What do you do?

DominantGirl00: Heh, I am the boss. I rule over everyone in my company.

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: O.O A woman in charge. I like that. 

DominantGirl00: That's great. You sound nice. How come you don't have a girlfriend? ^_^ 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: I am trying. ;) 

DominantGirl00: If at first you don't succeed, try. Try again, ROFL. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Such words of wisdom. Do you have a pic? 

Stephanie felt the beads of sweat forming on her neck. 

DominantGirl00: Nope, sorry. My scanner is broken. 

"Just lie," Stephanie told herself calmly. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Tell me really why you won't give me a pic.

"Damn," Stephanie shouted. 

DominantGirl00: Really. It's broken. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: fine, fine. When are you getting it fixed? 

DominantGirl00: Tomorrow.

"Reminder, get a scanner tomorrow." Stephanie told herself. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: I except a pic tomorrow. Now, I g2g, so I will "see" you tomorrow. =) Bye bye. 

Stephanie groaned and exited the IM. 

Signing quickly off AOL, she sighed to herself. "Now what am I going to do?" 


	4. The Pic

Message Through a Wire

Message Through a Wire

A fic by The Angel 

Chapter Four: The Pic 

You never really do know who's on the other end of that instant message…

~*~*~ 

Stephanie raised her eyebrow in distress. "Geez… Maybe I can go onto a hot porn site, get a good brunette, and send it. Maybe that will get him off my back." Stephanie clicked onto a site. 

She wrinkled her nose in disgust when they intro popped up. "Geez, what have I got myself into?" She clicked on the first brunette she saw and saved it on her hard drive. 

"Let's just hope that no one logs on here." Stephanie prayed as she clicked 'save.' 

The doorbell rang, and Stephanie sighed and logged off her computer completely. "Who is it?" She asked, putting her eye through the peephole. "Chris Jericho." Stephanie groaned. "What do you want?" Chris smiled and stepped into the house, but only got shoved by Stephanie.

"I didn't say you were invited in." Chris smirked at her. "Well, I invited myself in." Stephanie shrugged. "Any particular reason why?" Chris rolled his eyes. "Yes, there is in fact. I was just stopping by." Stephanie placed her hands on her hips. 

She closed the door and rolled her eyes. "Fine. Come, sit down." Chris Jericho plopped down on the crimson couch. "Nice place you got here." He commented casually. She eyed him. "Don't start with the compliments." Chris held up his hands. "All right, all right." 

"Do you want coffee?" Stephanie handed Chris a blue mug. Chris took it and looked at it suspiciously. He poked a finger on the brim. "Are you sure this isn't hot mud, Steph?" Stephanie snorted at him. "Please, Chris. You think you have me all figured out. I would never stoop that low."

She walked back into the kitchen, whistling innocently as she went. "Oh, you have the latest laptop version! Can I check it out?" Chris pleaded. Stephanie looked at Chris as if he had five heads. "What makes you think I would POSSIBLY agree to that?" 

"Fine, whatever." Chris set down his mug and headed for the door. "Oh, leaving so soon?" Chris nodded and smirked. "Yes, as sad as it may be. You know, I really do enjoy these brief visits that we share." And with that, he left. 

Stephanie decided that BREAKDOWNDAWALL1 was waiting for her pic, and she decided to get a scanner today. 

*

"Okay…Setup." Stephanie made a face at her newest computer accessory. "Now all I have to do is connect the red thingie to the blue thingie… Wait. That would cause an explosion!" Stephanie blew the bangs away from her face and sighed. 

I can really use a computer whiz to help me, she thought. Shane was really good with this, but he away at the WWF headquarters. She shrugged. "I can handle it," She told herself. She connected the scanner to her tower, and it caused a big huff of smoke. 

Chris was very good with computers. Stephanie thought she could get the room where Chris was staying and ask him to connect her scanner. "But why would I want to call Chris Jericho?" Stephanie asked herself, bending over to connect another wire. "Because you have a thing for him," The evil side of her whispered. "I do not!" Stephanie proclaimed. 

"He's just very good with computers." She told herself. This was giving her a headache. "Can I just connect this fucking thing!" She screamed. She pulled the wires out, causing more smoke. 

"Not good." Stephanie coughed. "Great." Stephanie reread the passage on connecting it, and smiled when it finally came up without any smoke. Clearing the area of any wires and such, Stephanie quickly logged on and blocked everyone. 

But then she doubted something. What if this guy went into the site and saw "her" picture there? He would think she was some slut! "Not a good idea. Well, might as well send me one of me. Hope he is slow and thinks it's just one of my regular fan pictures." 

She scanned a picture of herself from when she went to a dinner party at the Hardyz. She sent it to BREAKDOWNDAWALL1, and unblocked everyone. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Hi. Nice pic. But next time, send me one of YOU. 

DominantGirl00: Yeah, well, that's the nicest pic I have of Stephanie McMahon. And I sorta look like her. 

Chris Jericho printed out the picture. In the background, he could make out a faint shadow of Vince, Jeff, and he could see Lita's arm sticking out. This was the Hardy dinner party. No one knew about this except the people that attended. 

Now it all made sense. The screen name- DominantGirl00. The profession- I am the boss. I rule over everyone. Chris chuckled and stroked his chin. Well, as long as he was talking to the Billion Dollar Princess, he might as well screw with her mind. 


	5. You Don't Know Me, But I Know You

Message Through a Wire

Message Through a Wire

A fic by The Angel 

Chapter Five: You Don't Know Me, But I Know You 

You never really do know who's on the other end of that instant message… 

~*~*~ 

Chris chuckled to himself. "This is going to be great. Now I got Stephanie McMahon Helmsley right where I want her…In the palm of my hand." He paused and scratched his chin. Thinking of a good question to ask her, he leaned back in his gray chair. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: So… Your name doesn't happen to be Stephanie, right? 

He giggled to himself. When it comes to screwing with one's mind, Y2J surely does it correctly. Stephanie scratched her cheek and drummed her fingernails on her desk. 

DominantGirl00: Yes, it is in fact. 

Chris chuckled. "How convenient." 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: I see… Are you one of those people that are trying to meet her on fanatic? 

DominantGirl00: Didn't they cancel that show?

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Heh, as if anyone would want to meet Stephanie McMahon. She's such a bitch. 

DominantGirl00: Actually, she happens to be a very caring person! 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: How do you know? Have you met her? 

Stephanie rolled her eyes. "This dude has all the answers," She sighed. Typing quickly, she wrote:

  
DominantGirl00: No, I saw her on Tough Enough. The girls thought she was totally cool. 

Chris smirked. "I have to admit. She covered that one up pretty well." 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: So… Where do you live now? 

DominantGirl00: I travel. Right now I am in Texas.

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Oh my god. How funny, I am in Texas too. What part? 

DominantGirl00: San Antonio. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: So am I. Isn't that amazing? 

Stephanie coughed loudly to keep from choking. 

DominantGirl00: Yeah…Amazing. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: Wanna meet somewhere tomorrow? 

DominantGirl00: Where? 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: How about….Ranch Coffee Shop? 

DominantGirl00: Ranch Coffee Shop it is. 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: What time?

DominantGirl00: Eleven am? 

BREAKDOWNDAWALL1: See you at Ranch Coffee Shop at eleven am. Bye. 

DominantGirl00: Bye. 

She logged off and shook her head in disbelief. "Now I am in trouble." 

*


	6. The Meeting, Part One

Message Through a Wire

Message Through a Wire

A fic by The Angel 

Chapter Six: The Meeting, Part One

Because you never really do know who's on the other end of that instant message… 

~*~*~ 

9:04 am: 

Stephanie balanced her black cordless phone on her shoulder. "I am anxious." She said. "Because I want the guy's reaction when he sees that it's me." The person on the other end, Linda McMahon frowned. 

"For all we know he could be a hungry rapist, waiting for his next victim- you." Linda sighed. "I wish you weren't so willing." Stephanie smirked. "Don't start talking like Chris Jericho. And that's another thing- this guy is a Jericho fan. They're slow!" 

Click! Linda hung up. Stephanie sighed and slammed the phone back into receiver. 

*

Chris Jericho lazily walked into the hotel diner for a quick breakfast. He was not showered, he just threw on a pair of jeans and an exercise shirt. He would get ready for the meeting after his breakfast. 

"May I help you, Chris?" The waitress asked. Chris was a regular at the diner whenever they were in Texas. "Yeah," He said, handing her a menu back. "I'll just have some pancakes and coffee." 

The waitress nodded and headed out back, screaming the order. Chris laid his head back on the red, billowy booth. He thought about the meeting, which was scheduled for two hours later. 

"This should be interesting." He broke out of his reverie when his order arrived. 

*

9:35 am:

Stephanie sighs and rummages through her suitcase. "I have nothing to wear!" She screams. Annoyed, she pulled out a magenta tank top and a black shirt. With a little lipstick, this outfit might do. 

Throwing the clothes on her bed, she pulls out a bar of soap and a washcloth. The clock is ticking, she thought. Better get a move on. Heading into the bathroom, she pulls the curtain to cover the bathtub. 

As time grew nearer, she became more and more intrigued. 

*

After throwing a tip to the waitress, Chris Jericho sprinted to the hotel elevator. He stops at the elevator operator. "Do you have the time?" The elevator man stiffly pulls up his sleeve. "9:36 am." Chris nods and jumps into the elevator. 

"What floor?" The man asks. Chris leaned over and pressed the seventh button. "Seven." He grins immaturely. The elevator operator sighs. "Seven it is." And they both waited as the elevator brought them up to the destination. 

When they got there, the man held the door open as well as his hand. "How about a tip, Mr. Jericho?" Chris grinned. "Okay. When people get into the elevator, try not to be so stand offish. You'll make friends!" And he laughed and ran back to his room. 

*

10:13 am:

Stephanie shivered and dried herself off with a teal towel. Looking in the mirror, she frowned at her reflection. "I am not pretty," She frowned. "This guy is only going to like me because of my last name." Sighing, she lazily got dressed. 

Then she let her imagination run wild, just like she told BREAKDOWNDAWALL1. Would this guy be nice? Would this guy be cute? Would this guy be funny? Would this guy even be a guy at all? She wondered. She hoped that at least this guy didn't lie about his gender…

"Maybe mom's right. Maybe even, as much as I hate to admit it, maybe Chris Jericho is right. Maybe I am too willing." She moved her hair from the back of her shirt and grinned a bit. Maybe if she felt good, she'd look good. Or the other way around. She didn't really know. 

She picked up her favorite lipstick shade, called "Raspberry Mocha." It was the color of raspberry, but it had a mocha coffee flavored. It was weird, Stephanie knew, but it was her absolute favorite. Smearing some on her lips, Stephanie picked up her light burgundy eye shadow. 

"I met a guy on the Internet…" She sang. It wasn't a song, but she just put into rhythm. "And he turned out to be cool…" She sang it the way she sang on RAW. She placed her makeup back down. "I am really in deep trouble, now. But I already agreed to this, and I am not backing out." 

*

Chris frowned as he peaked into the hotel medicine cabinet. "These colognes suck." He murmured. Taking the one that looked the best, he patted some on his neck. Why am I getting all dressed up for? He thought. This is Stephanie. 

"Ah, to hell with it." He decided. He gave himself a quick shave. I couldn't say I hated Steph, Chris thought as he gently pushed the razor off of his little stubble on his chin. But I couldn't say I love her either. 

I don't know what I mean anymore! His mind screamed at him. All he was really going to this meeting for was to piss Stephanie off, and see her reaction when she found out that he was BREAKDOWNDAWALL1. Right? 

Wrong. 


	7. The Meeting, Part Two: This Cannot Be Ha...

Message Through a Wire

Message Through a Wire

A fic by The Angel 

Chapter Seven: The Meeting, Part Two: This Cannot be Happening…

~*~*~

"Take me to the Ranch Coffee Shop." Stephanie threw her purse in her limo. "Go, driver!" She yelled. "I am late for an appointment." Stephanie frowned and looked at her watch. It read 10:48 am. The coffee shop was a good twenty minutes away. 

She didn't want this person to think that she'd stood them up. "I need to be there by eleven. GO!" She screamed. The driver frowned. "But I can't take you there until a quarter after. It's a long ride." 

"Speed or something!" Stephanie shouts. The driver rolls his eyes. "But what about the cops?" Stephanie felt like choking this moron. "Don't worry about them! I can bribe them! Just go, go, go!" The driver filed into the seat and sped away. Stephanie leaned back in her seat and sighed. 

She smirked at Leon, the driver. "You know, I shouldn't have to tell you three times to go. I am your boss, I pay your measly salary, and you should obey my orders. WATCH OUT FOR THAT BIKE!" Stephanie screamed. "What the hell are you doing speeding, you jackass?"

"Obeying your orders." Leon said simply. 

"Don't ever take me seriously again!" Stephanie clutched her heart. 

*

"Holy crap," Jericho murmured. "I am late, I am late, for a very important date…Wait. This is not a date. It's just a meeting. We'll have coffee and throw insults at each other. It'll be fun." Yes, Chris, his head said. Extremely fun. Making Steph cry into her frappachino would be just that satisfaction you need. 

"Yes," Jericho said quietly. "I am VERY satisfied…" 

Throwing his hair back into a ponytail, he frowned in the mirror. "I look like Kid Rock." He shook his hair out of the ponytail. He frowned and pulled out his most wrinkled shirt. "This oughta push Steph's button." 

Examining the shirt over, he scratched his chin. "Maybe I better iron it." 

*

"Here we are, Miss McMahon." Leon said, opening Steph's door. "Mrs. Helmsley," Stephanie corrected. "Not for long," Leon muttered. Stephanie glared at him and smoothed out her outfit. She went inside the Ranch Coffee Shop and saw Jericho sitting at a table. 

She groaned. "Jericho! Must you always follow me everywhere? I am meeting someone, and I don't need you there fucking it up." She placed her hands on her hips and smirked. Jericho smiled to himself and got up. "Who are you meeting?" 

"None of your damn business." Stephanie rolled her eyes. Jericho grinned. "His name doesn't happen to be BREAKDOWNDAWALL1, does it?" Stephanie glared at him. "That's his screen name- Wait. How did you…?" 

Jericho handed her a limp flower. "Surprise!" Stephanie screamed. "No! No! This is NOT happening! NO WAY!" 

She groaned and burst into tears. "I flirted with YOU?" Stephanie asked in shock. Jericho smirked. "Hey, you never thought you would do that, now, didn't ya?" Stephanie groaned. "Oh my god… My whole life, crumbling into pieces." 

"I'll get a shovel," Jericho added 'helpfully.' Stephanie took a cup off coffee off a table and drank it. "Don't help me," She snapped. Jericho grinned sideways. "Okay… I suppose you're going to walk out on me now, right?" 

Stephanie sighed and shook her hand. "No. I said I'd meet you for coffee, and that's what I am going to do. Even if it is coffee with… You." She sputtered the last word out. 

"That's the spirit." Jericho smiled. 


	8. Coffee Talk

Message Through a Wire

Message Through a Wire

A fic by the Angel 

Chapter Eight: Coffee Talk 

"So…" Stephanie said, at lost for words at her newfound internet friend. "You like the color blue?" She didn't know any other way to start up a conversation. Chris smiled and twirled a spoon in his foamy mocha beverage. "Yes," He sheepishly admitted. He held a finger to his lips. "Shush, be very, very quiet about it." 

Stephanie giggled a bit. She didn't expect the meeting with Chris to be anything like this. Sure, she was silent and feeling awkward. She would feel more awkward if he had been insulting her. She kept an eye out for those, though. 

"I am very glad it turned out like this," Chris said softly as Stephanie buried her face into her cup. He did that when he did it intentionally, just so Stephanie could gag on her drink. She cleared her throat. "Why?" 

Chris shrugged. "I don't know… My nasty, sarcastic, taunting reputation just seemed to get old. And I wanted to go back and erase any mistake I ever made." Stephanie snorted. "You'd be dead before you even got to the bottom of the list." 

"I know. That's why I am starting right now." Chris smiled at Stephanie. "Stephanie, I am going to take back every nasty thing I called you over the years." Stephanie smirked. "This is going to take a while." 

Chris frowned. "Okay. You are not a dirty, disgusting, two cent, trashbag, measly, nasty, smelly-" 

"Get to the point." Stephanie sneered. 

"Okay. You're not a slut, or a ho, or any of those things." 

Stephanie grinned as Jericho went back to his drink. "Jericho?" Stephanie asked. Chris looked up. "What?" She grinned. "Thanks." He nodded. "No problem, Stephanie. Just one thing." 

"Yeah, Jericho?" 

"Call me Chris." 

*

"How did the meeting go?" Stacy asked Stephanie as soon as she walked into the Alliance dressing room. "It was okay…I guess." Torrie grinned. "Who was it?" She squealed. "Uh…Some guy." Steph lied. 

How could she tell members of the Alliance that it was Chris Jericho? And how could she tell them that she was meeting him again? 

"Was he cute?" Stacy asked, giggling. Stephanie blinked. "Yes." She told the truth. She did think Chris was very attractive. But no one was supposed to know that. "If you dump him, can I have his number?" Torrie asked. 

Stephanie sighed. "Yes, whatever. Just go. The Boss needs sometime to herself." The two blondes looked at each other, clueless, and walked out of the door. 

Not ten minutes when she was alone, there was a knock on the door. "Come in!" She growled. Chris Jericho entered the room. "Oh. Hi. Sorry. Hi. I said that already." She giggled, feeling like a complete and utter jackass. 

"Um… About coffee today-" Chris started. "I enjoyed it!" Stephanie said quickly. Chris smiled. "Good. So did I. Want to take it a step further?" 

Stephanie raised an eyebrow. "What?" 

"Do you want to go to dinner tomorrow?" Jericho asked quickly. 

"Yes." Stephanie replied. 


	9. What's That Tingly Feeling? It's Love, S...

Message Through a Wire

Message Through a Wire

A fic by the Angel 

Chapter Nine: What's This Tingly Feeling? It's Love, Steph! 

~*~*~

"Aren't we all dressed up, Sis?" Shane commented. Stephanie was dressed in silk, periwinkle tube top and stretchy black pants. Her periwinkle toes seeped out of clunky sandals. "Yes, we are." Stephanie said proudly. 

Shane bit into an apple. "Going to see Hunter?" Stephanie raised an eyebrow. "Who? Oh, yeah! Hunter. Triple H. My husband. Yes, I am going to see him now." Shane smiled. "He's in Alabama." 

"How far is Texas from Alabama?" Stephanie asked simply. Shane walked away, giving his sister a dirty look. "Damn," Stephanie sighed. "Ever hear of privacy?" She mumbled. 

She headed out the door, but was meant by Chris. "Hey." He grinned. "You look fantastic." Stephanie smiled. "Thanks. You look good too. But we can't meet here." Chris frowned. "Why not?" 

"Because," Stephanie hissed, "the Alliance will know that we're together. I already lied to Shane that I was going to see Hunter." Chris had a quizzical look on his face. "But he's in Alabama-" 

"I know!" Stephanie groaned. "Come on, let's go." Stephanie grabbed Chris's hand as she led him out of the arena. "Where are we going?" She asked him. Chris grinned. "Somewhere nice." 

*

As Chris and Stephanie sat in the diner, both gnawing on bread and vegetables, Chris laughed. "I never thought I'd see the day that I'd be sitting across from you at a table, not throwing insults at your face." 

"Believe me, Chris. I thought that too." Stephanie smiled as she took another swig of her water. "Can we order? I am starving!" Stephanie complained. Chris nodded and snapped his fingers. "Waiter!" 

"Mr. Jericho, Miss McMahon, can I help you?" The waiter asked. Stephanie and Chris glanced at each other and grinned. "Yes, I would like a bottle of white wine, and as for the dinner, I would like the Escargot." 

Chris gagged. "Snails?" He whispered. "Mr. Jericho, you're order, please?" The waiter asked, waiting. Chris looked to Steph. "Try Escargot," She encouraged. "It's very good. Tastes like shrimp." 

"I will also have the Escargot," Chris smiled happily. 

Steph didn't know what it is. When Chris smiled, she smiled. When he laughed, even if something wasn't funny, she laughed. And now just the sight of him made her feel tingly. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat. 

"Something wrong, Steph?" Chris asked. Stephanie got up. "I need to use the Ladies Room, excuse me." She mad dash to the pink door. She looked at herself in the mirror. She looked the same. She stood sideways and checked her stomach. She looked the same. 

But inside, it was like she got thirty thousand electric volts of lightening. She sighed. "No. It can't be." 

Yes, it can be, Stephanie McMahon Helmsley. You're in love with Chris Jericho. 


	10. Of Snails and Love

Message Through a Wire

Message Through a Wire

A fic by The Angel 

Chapter Ten: Of Snails and Love 

~*~*~

  
"Stephanie!" Terri called out. Stephanie walked out the bathroom, horror on her face. Terri and Raven were here! "Son of a bitch!" She muttered. "Hi!" Stephanie smiled as looked up to Raven and Terri. 

Terri grinned. "Who are you here with, Stephanie? Or are you alone?" Stephanie grinned. Remember, she thought. Fire Terri on RAW. "I am actually here with someone." Stephanie said. 

"Oh, who?" Raven asked, pulling a wisp of blonde hair out of his eye. "Er… Well, we were just leaving, so…" Terri linked arms with Raven. "Oh, okay." Stephanie nodded and ran to the table. "Chris, we got to leave." 

Chris frowned. "But our food didn't even come yet." Stephanie grabbed his arm. "Um… I can make Escargot!" Chris blinked. "You can?" 

"Yes," Stephanie reassured him. "Cooking is one of my many talents." Chris smirked. "What's the other? Singing?" Stephanie mock laughed and shook her head. "Just come on. We got to go." Defeated, Chris frowned. "Okay." 

*

"Um…Stephanie?" Chris moaned, poking his fork at his dinner. "Should the snails be moving on my plate?" Stephanie sighed. "Just eat them." Chris groaned. "But I don't like to eat when my dinner is staring me right in the face." 

Stephanie sighed and took the plate. "I'll boil the snails some more." She took the slimy animals and plopped them back into the pot. Chris cringed. 

A few minutes later, Steph slid the plate back to Chris. "Eat up." She smiled. Chris put a snail into his mouth. He couldn't say he enjoyed it. 


	11. If It's Fate, It's Fate

Message Through a Wire

Message Through a Wire

By the Angel 

Chapter Eleven: If it's Fate, It's Fate 

~*~*~

"What? You don't enjoy my cooking?" Stephanie pouted. Chris grinned. "I do." Stephanie frowned at his plate. "Then why aren't you eating any?" Chris sighed to himself. "I am not a big snails fan, is all." 

Stephanie shrugged. "Okay then." She spooned the snails off of his plate and put them on her own. She wrapped the plate in plastic baggage. "My family likes snails. When I see Shane, I'll give them to him." 

Chris turned green. 

"Look, Chris," Stephanie frowned. Chris stood up. "I know what you're going to say. It's not going to work out, blah, blah, blah… Let's just be friends." Stephanie shook her head. "I don't know if we can even be friends…This is so…" 

Chris cocked his head thoughtfully. "Awkward?" 

"Exactly." Stephanie groaned. "I don't if we could do this." Chris nodded. "Yeah, I understand. What about your reputation, MY reputation…Geez, we were stupid to even try this." 

Stephanie giggled. "You never really do know who's on the end of that instant message." Chris nodded and extended his hand. Stephanie shook it. "It was a pleasure doing business with you." He grinned. 

"So now we can go back to hating each other?" Stephanie joked. 

"I'll get the writers to tone down on the slut jokes," Chris grinned. 

They giggled. 

*

Stephanie cleaned up the remains of the food that she and Chris pigged out on. Sighing, she reminded herself to hire the maid back that she fired. From the corner of her eye, she spotted the laptop computer. 

"No, Stephanie." She told herself, putting a cup in the sink. "Oh, hell." She couldn't resist. "I'll change my screen name." 

Pondering a good screen name, she decided on Bitch4Life. She grinned. 

*

Chris sighed and tapped his fingers on his keyboard. He needed to come up with a new screen name. BREAKDOWNDAWALL1 reminded him of Stephanie. "Heh," He laughed as he thought of one. 

"AyatollMole5." He had no idea where the mole and the 5 came from, but it looked pretty cool. He went into a WWF chat room. 

Bitch4Life: Anyone want 2 chat? 

Chris smiled. He clicked on an instant message. 

AyatollMole5: Hi

Bitch4Life: Hey

AyatollMole5: What's ^? 

Bitch4Life: Oh, nothing. I just got out of a relationship. 

AyatollMole5: So did I. 

~

Finish 


End file.
